Back to my original lover

Finally, I decided to head back to my original Lover which is God, Lord Jesus Christ, after battling with loving or not the man whom I thot could be my life partner which eventually God told me he isn't what God has planned for me.
I was indeed really sad..
pulling myself thru the nite..asking God..why why why..
after putting in so much effort..to make this work..but...result: Flunk!

Listening to christian songs and reading the bible..
recalling what my sister ask me.. "Did you hear God's voice when you pray? Or u r just too concentrating to pour out all you want to God and not listening.."

Seriously..I haven't being reading the bible everyday which I should tho I did devotion on and off..not consistent..
I guess I place him more important than God subconciously...
That's probably what God wants me to realise...

Now I repent..
Decided that there is no lover as good as God.
As my morning poem prayer describe..
Worldly love has a price to pay..most of the time it brings uncertainty..and hurts..
But God's love doesn't.
Its a relieve to see the sunshine in the morning..
finally the dark scary nite has passed..
Darkness often gathers lots of emotions and thots esp negative thots and make one feel like the end of the world..

I felt relieve and thankful this morning to see the sun and God's beautiful creation.
Seeing God's love for me..
The sunlight he created chased all the darkness and negative thots away.
Thank You Jesus.

I made up my mind to start off each day from tomorrow onwards with prayer..and time alone with God. Motivated by my sister who wakes up 5am in the morning to go to Mass in catholic church to spend time quietly with God.
I just found out that St. Andrew Cathedral opens daily at 7am for people to go in to quiet themselve to pray and spend quiet time with God.
Will try out some day.
abit scare cuz never enters that place before..